Sunday, May 12, 2013

$$


I hate money.
Well, more accurately, I hate not having money.
It's not that I'm a rich boy who gets pouty whenever his dad didn't buy him the latest CoD game. It's more I'm a son of a busboy who can't control money. It's not fun to admit that, it never is. I go to a school where my classmates parents are lawyers, doctors, teachers, technicians, etc... I'm the kid in the corner whose mom doesn't get a job because it's religiously sanctioned. I'm the kid who can't pay $10,000 a year for college while others are paying $30,000.
But that's not what hurts. What hurts is going to my parents bank account - I pay their bills online since they're not tech savvy - and knowing that we barely have enough to pay the bills. Every time the water bill lands on my desk, my heart skips a beat because I know that's going to take a lot out. I know my dad’s weekly wages and his weekly expenses. They don't match up, not by a long shot. Living in a house because everybody else was buying one is biting us in the ass right now. Well, it always has. Having to pay thousands of dollars of maintenance cost and worrying about tenants paying their rent on time scratches away at our years. I hate not having money. I need it to support my family, to support myself. And I know that money is such a big part of life, more than passion will ever be.
It sucks.

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